DO NOT TRY THIS @ HOME

Music Videos are the reason for the downward spiral of society. Oh yeah I said it. Look at them, fake, glitzy, no one’s fat except Ross (Big shout outs to ROZAY) and that weird chubby kid I want to kill, commit suicide, and kill again in the “Teach me how to Dougie” video, beautiful women, guns, clothes tacos, cars, spreads of fine cheeses that I've never tasted before, and money. All that's all good but more than likely if you’re on the other end of the screen like me you broke. Not like regular broke I mean like scrounging up some quarters to buy a loosie, I aint got no insurance, momma basement is my apartment broke. But because of music videos by Hype Williams your basement apartment with the fridge upstairs with your orange juice you labeled because you don't want no one to drink it (sign you need to MOVE THE FUCK OUT!!!) Has all the hot clothes, sneakers, and quality fine shit you could fake the funk with, but why?

Visual stimulation is a bastard. You see it, you want it, and if you keep seeing it you’re going to want it more and more. How many of us assholes wanted spinning rims? Now ask yourself when was the last time you have seen a spinning rim? At one Point a set of 20 inch (rims not even old enough to drink yet I know) was 10k. A year of college at most universities or enough to buy a quarter of Jamaica. Pretty stupid when you think about it, but 36 Mafia had a video called "I Ride Spiners" and yes we remember those seasons of "MTV Cribs" where everyone from Justin Timberlake to Barbara Walters had a set, and we wanted them.  Watching 3 minutes and 22 seconds of Dame Dash running around drunk, spilling expensive champagne on women while Jay-Z sat on a car with wheels spinning made you think that spinning rims was better than sliced bread.  Excuse me for riding in the wheels the engineers who built the car deemed proper for max safety, oh and saving 10 grand.

 You ever notice the real pretty girl in the bikini who looks like she is Brazilian, Egyptian, Dominican, Columbian, and French. The one all wrapped around that swamp monkey’s finger (Lil’ Wayne is the monkey I’m talking about). She don’t like him, she don’t like you, I don’t like you, more than likely you don’t like you but damn it she like Plies she like Craig Mac (old school ugly rapper right there). Oh yes these video Vixens (hoes) don’t care about looks do they. You want to know why cause these broads is getting paid to sit on his lap. And most of the time if they do like them it’s because money and diamonds bring a whole different type of swag and when you hop up out of bed and put your swag on its more than likely out of the Old Spice bottle (or Target/Wal-Mart equivalent). So after you go watch that video you go out with your extra regular ass and decide to go talk to Miss I’m fine as shit with a great personality and be mad when she don’t want you.

In conclusion I want you to think about it like this, THE SHIT AINT REAL, NONE OF IT. No one is running around calling Rick Ross who used to be a prison guard mind you El Jefe, Lil Wayne is not a Martian, Robin Thicke aint screwing all these broads neither is Maxwell, Trey Songs, Diddy or anyone from G-Unit, and Lil Momma in real life is a troll from under the Brooklyn bridge(not joking, and she fuckin sucks). Turn off BET (don’t know why you would watch it any way), stop modeling your life after what you see on television cause if you do your going to look pretty FUCKIN stupid when you try the Erica Badu “Window Seat” video or any video for that matter. Go read a book or listen to an album and see where that takes your imagination instead of letting someone else tell you what you should think.

Song of The Week: Kanye West ft. The Game - Crack Music

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